Virgo

The ever practical perfectionist Virgo celebrates their birthday during the same month that dictates the main motivating archetype of their personalities. End of August and beginning of September bring the largest harvest time on earth. This is a time of year that people gather and bring together all the hard work from the summer, and all the waiting from the previous winter. They go out into the fields and pastures as the summer light begins to ebb and the summer heat starts to wane. In the same way Virgo’s love to bring what seems to be chaos into synthesis, and create harmony when there is discord.

Ruled by Mercury, Virgo is a bit of a head over heart person, and yet, as previous Virgo lovers in my life have amply demonstrated, they allow their childhood to permeate the rest of their life, which imbues everything that they do with a profound level of wonder and excitement. In relationships the tension between intellect and wonder, can produce a dizzying display of conversationalism and an independent search for knowledge, that can either alienate you as a Virgo’s lover or bring you in so thoroughly that you could never imagine being with someone as interesting or as dynamic.

Your Virgo lover is not only shy but is extremely hard on his/her self, and that is a combination that can lead to some problematic personality traits. It can, at first, seem as though Virgo is completely detached, without emotion, and yet precisely the opposite is true. They are keenly sensitive, and this can be seen as any depth of relationship is explored between you and your Virgo lover.

This criticism is the basis of your lover’s most annoying personality trait: the external critic that exists in every Virgo. Despite your best attempts to let your partner know how much this type of nagging examination of all you faults, bugs you, they persist. It is as much a reflection of how incomplete they sometimes feel, and less about you. But it is something that will drive away not only casual relationships, but the meaningful ones as well.

Virgo has a hard enough time finding someone that they feel can even measure up to the harsh light of their ever evaluating third eye, but once they do find that special someone, the temptation can be to continue to perfect that person. As much as it is appealing to let Virgo take a red marking pen to your personality because you desire their love, it is important to remember that they are reflecting their own insecurities. In letting them continue this type of behavior you are reconstituting their own identity issues.

Don’t let Virgo fool you though. It is easy to mistake the shyness of the Virgo as aloofness, when really all it is that they are more comfortable with intellectualizing and dialoging than spilling their dark emotional secrets. It is for this reason that watching and touching them is the best way to create an intimate physical connection, rather than over eloquent speech. They want to be held when they need to feel loved, fed when they are hungry, and kissed when they feel passionate. They are an earth sign, and thus feel most at home with their five senses, so they are also known to be hot in bed.

***Warning, withholding of affection as a means to argue or get something from a Virgo, will inevitably backfire. Instead of motivating them it will reduce the reason that they want to do something for you in the first place. They will feel unloved when not touched, and they will lose interest in an attempt to protect themselves. Always bribe your Virgo with love and sex, never with negatives.